Learning to be Alone

One of the most important skills I find teaching a new foster dog is -besides where to pee and poo- is learning how to be alone for short periods of time. Let's face it, most families work, work outside of the home and have at least a few hours a day where puppy or dog has to be okay left alone. Even families that have someone work from home have to go get groceries on a hot day and couldn't take a dog in the car at all times. And if a family goes away, very, very few facilities offer 24/7 companionship. So learning to be alone is paramount, both to the happiness of the dog, and the dog keeping it's home for life.

Separation anxiety is one of the leading behavioral causes of getting rid of a dog. And who can truly blame them at times, especially if you get complained on by neighbors, come home to a destroyed house or potentially even a sick dog who has gotten into something. No one should get rid of their dog, but I play devil's advocate. Why not prevent, and train how to be alone?

So, a long time ago we implemented crate-time into our foster boot-camp, and we implemented short periods of "away time" as well, of course taking into consideration the dog's age! It's taken over a dozen foster dogs to perfect (or nearly perfect) a system, but it's amazing how quickly everyone becomes accustomed to routine.

Take for example, dear little Chopin, who as sweet a puppy as he is, from the get-go didn't let being out of viewing distance of EITHER person in the room. He has good reason, he just left his littermates, his TG family, the people he saw every day for weeks. But on the flip side of the coin, this behavior could really hinder him in a new environment. So, we snuggled, played with, comforted him, but as well, we took steps to  slowly start the process of "alone".

So, starting night one, all meals are fed in the crate. Very easy way to build a like for the crate very quickly. (Plus it is VERY handy to figure out just how much each one is eating.) Boom, your in for your meal. You finish your meal, you can come out. Overnight the first night, we let Chopin and Peanut share a crate -right beside the bed so they can still smell us, hear us, and if we hear that "OMG I got to pee" sound, get him out for a pee. As they are both used to another dog's company at all times the TG pups we usually begin crating together and slowly separate. Some initial complaining from Chopin on night one, but he settles for the night after about an hour.

Day Two, with the handy use of a baby gate and two living rooms, we begin desensitizing Chopin to people leaving the room (since he is a whiny baby even if someone is in the room with him but the other person leaves, kind of a big warning sign for some bigger separation anxiety down the road if we don't work quick). I leave the room, Jerrad drops tasty pieces of ham. Jerrad leaves the room, the same thing happens. We do this half a dozen times, then about half a dozen times where the person stays away for longer. Peanut doesn't seem to care about the whole situation of leaving, but what the heck, we'll desensitize her to the same process anyway. Ham for everyone.

We split Chopin's food up to about 4-5 different little meals, all of which he will eat in his crate. Each meal, we build the length of time he's in there. At first, as soon as he's done his meal, he can come out, but by about the fifth meal, he is staying in an extra 10-15 minutes after he's done eating. Day two, meal 4, we are seeing a puppy who rushes to his crate and a puppy who is much calmer when someone leaves the room. Jerrad is happy I can go pee without puppy making a fuss. I am happy Jerrad can go work on the car without puppy making a fuss!

Night-time he sleeps with Peanut again, no fuss this overnight.

Day Three, we work a little on the desensitizing to people leaving, but he seems to get this game. We challenge it further at night by taking out food rewards and exchanging for "good boy" and an ear scratch. With success at this game, we move to new protocol "on your own" for fifteen minutes. We BOTH leave the room. I go hang in the other living room, far enough way to be considered "away", but close enough to deal with anything if it's to occur. Expecting a bit of a fuss first time around, Chopin surprises us, whines for a minute and is quiet. We find him cuddled up to Beckett ten minutes later. Great, much more than we thought we'd get, PLUS no destructive puppy.

Since he is excited to see us return, we practice a new game. With our handy-dandy baby gate preventing him from getting to us, any time he jumps at the gate or barks, I leave, triggering the exact opposite reaction of what he wants to get. So, within three times, we get a polite tail-wagging puppy at the gate. He is smart, plus he is mellow so it's helpful. Of course we want him happy to see us, but we don't need extravagant displays. Our aim in preventing/eliminating his minor separation anxiety is calm exits, and CALM returns. The whole key is to make everything "no big deal."

In the afternoon he goes to daycare, and after he comes home from daycare (exhausted) we give him food and a whole hour of crate-time on his own. No fuss. Food + exhaustion means there's no energy to kick up a fuss. He also sleeps the whole night in his crate by himself (by the bed still). He is rushing to his crate for every meal time.

Day Four, because we've had a lot of success over the past three days, and except for the odd time there is no whining when one of us leave, it's time to work on some more crate-time. Even if his new family doesn't want to use a crate, I truly think crate-training is an important life-skill. Planes, vet offices, boarding kennels, grooming facilities -at some point, your dog will find itself having to be in a crate. I think you owe it to them to do the training to make it a comfortable experience. So, we start with just an hour, and a REALLY good chew toy, and someone in the room with him, there's a little initial fuss, but he gets occupied with the toy quickly (thanks for the antlers Denise, with peanut butter on top of them they are un-resistable!) He goes to daycare again in the afternoon, and when we come home reality sets in "It's grocery time."

Jerrad could go on his own, but pup is tired, we've worked on the issue, and I think he's ready for an hour of no one home. So, food time, pop pup in his crate, and off we go for groceries. We come home to a puppy who even though we open the door of his crate, is doggone tired and doesn't get up. So, he goes back to bed for two more hours until it's pee time and then time for real bed.

Day Five presents us with some problems since my car is on the fritz, and we really don't want pup at daycare three days in a row. That too is not a realistic expectation of a new home, I never want to build my fosters into a routine that isn't easily managed by a new family. Jerrad is home, but has to run me back and forth to work since we're down to one car, and has a job interview. These three things take about 45 minutes each and are divided throughout the day. With the success we've already achieved, and a mellower pup who has two days into daycare, I think it's fair. So, we decide pup will have to crate for those three shorter periods, and each of those times can be his meal time. Pup does so well, two of the times we pull the blanket off his crate and he's like "WHHHATTT? I'm sleeping!" Jerrad forgets a chew toy the last time, but pup seems quite content when I get back from work, regardless of my absent-minded professor.

After That: 
Being a young pup, throughout the night beside the bed and two or three hours in a crate is the most I would do except on very odd occasion. He needs to be out exploring, cuddling, learning, being a puppy. But I was happy that yesterday night, when we had agility (an hour) and then a homecheck for Alice (another hour) plus the 15 minute(ish) drive each way, that he was a content puppy, very capable of being alone. Plus, he is doing well with short 15-20 minute bursts of being alone without a crate too, though has managed to find his way into the laundry basket once!

Are we done here: no way, we need to continue with the same routine, and whoever adopts him will have to continue to work on desensitizing to being alone -just like any puppy!-. But it's a start, and hopefully takes the edge off him when he finds his family.

PS: We were lucky, Peanut took to her crate right away! She will sneak in with Alice or Chopin sometimes, but goes in very willingly and settles down easily. We've been practicing 15-20 minute intervals outside the crate on her own, but she is kind of destructive -very quickly finds something to shred- so I don't trust her yet with me fully away from the house. With the set-up I have, I can hear in the other room if she's into mischief, how long I'm "away" that she gets into it, and if I need to can intervene. With Peanut being a year old, I'm comfortable with crating her up to 5 hours if I need too, though now she is starting to get bed privileges at night (bad foster mum, that was another "rule" I used to have). Ideally with her new home they either crate or have a set-up where she doesn't have full-access to the house. And then snuggle her in bed ;)

Alice came already crate-trained, which is a total bonus both for me, and for her new home. Of course Alice comes with some extra work in the socialization department since she wasn't socialized much in Taiwan, but she's apparently okay for up to nine hours in her crate. That's a little excessive for such a young dog, but in Taiwan it was either that or a life on the streets.

 In the end my goal with all my fosters is the same: make them as adoptable as possible, as adaptable as possible, and minimize any potential hang-ups for a smooth-as-possible transition to a forever home. Plus of course, keep them happy in their foster home :)